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Archive for The Human Spirit

The Video Deposition

Monday, May 13th, 2013

     Do you remember this Schwab investment TV advertisement? It is comparing a bad stock company to Schwab by portraying some boiler room stock-selling company in a unfavorable way. Their manager is telling all the sales people to get on the phone and pitch some crummy stock to customers by “let’s go out there and put some lipstick on that pig”.lipstick pig

     When I watch it, it still makes me laugh. It also reminds me a little bit about what sometimes happens in some of our cases. A thought on the evidence.  (Practice Alert)  I am going to tell you a blog secret between you and me!  Defense lawyers… your eyes are getting very sleepy. You better go catch a nap.   

     This involves why we video the depositions of the opposing party (defendant) on most of our cases. I am not insinuating that the other side is a pig. Just whether a jury perceives someone trying to be something that they are not. The defense attorney making their client get all  ”dressed up for court”. 

     This past week, I drove to Wytheville, Virginia, for my scheduled depositions. I was taking the defendant’s and the opposing attorney was questioning my client.  We also had the deputy who had investigated this 2010 crash. Because the defense attorney’s office was about 50 miles from the county, we agreed to have the depositions at the courthouse where the trial is scheduled.

     I showed up a little early so I could also get a look at the courtroom. Then, I was shown back to the law library where the depositions were scheduled. Soon, my client, the court reporter and videographer arrived. I had noticed the deposition for video and court reporter. The defense deposition notice was for transcription by the court reporter without any video.

     The defendant arrived before his lawyer. He was dressed in a T-shirt and jeans. Like he would normally dress everyday. Soon, his lawyer arrived. The depositions proceeded. After I had completed the first deposition, the videographer packed up and left.   

     Generally speaking, I think that people should basically dress comfortably. My grandfather was a farmer. He would always dress the way he wanted to… in overalls like a farmer. 

      In court cases, I believe that clients should basically dress in something that they normally and comfortably wear and not wear something that they would normally never wear. I think that some lawyers believe that their clients should always be dressed in their Sunday best; and if they don’t own dress clothes, they should buy some. To me, I think people act differently in clothes that they never wear.

    That takes me to why I like to videotape depositions.  In many cases, I will show the video deposition during trial. The jury usually begins watching the deposition. Then, I will sometimes notice when they look over at the defense table where the defendant is now all dressed up. Consciously or unconsciously, I think that it sends the message that the opposing party is trying to project something that they are not.

     After one trial, I even had a juror come up to me with a smile and comment on how “dressed up” the opposing party came for trial. Maybe it’s just my crazy thinking. I also think that videotaping keeps everyone more alert during the deposition and even captures the tone and pauses of the questions and answers.

     As to last week’s deposition,, it will be interesting to see if the opposing party shows up in his usual clothing or if the defense lawyer will decide to make him get “all dressed up”. 

     Hopefully, the defendant will do something to make the jury ask “why”. Then, maybe that will carry over on to the evidence. In every trial there is a truth-giver and someone who is perceived as less. I think being real about appearance might be part of that. There has to be a reason that “a picture is worth a thousand words”.  What do you think?

     For pic o’ day, I stayed with blame and evidence!!

blame

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Hoarding and Collecting

Wednesday, April 17th, 2013

     Sometimes I feel that I should give you a break by being a “brief blogger”. So, here is a shorty on collecting and hoarding. First, the collecting part.

     A USA Today article on change that is left at airports. Last year,  over 500K in change was left in those little baskets. The article speculates on some of the reasons… running late, forgetfulness and even just not wanting to be bothered with change. Maybe Lincoln should be bothered about being on the penny! It also gives a breakdown on the amounts per airport. 

     And for the hoarding part here is pic o’ day:

Hoarding

 

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Pizza Delivery Reminders

Monday, April 15th, 2013

     Reader’s Digest had an interesting list titled “13 things your pizza delivery guy won’t tell you“. I am posting this list because I think that it also has some good reminders for everyday living. Simple reminders about being prepared, generous, thoughtful and patient. Also, the simplicity of putting ourselves in “some else’s shoes”.

     I have attached the full list. Below are a few from the survey of pizza delivery drivers:

1. It’s pizza not a lifetime commitment. I probably have another phone ringing so make up your mind on the toppings.

2. We know when kids are prank calling us. Sometimes we even know the number they are calling from.

3. Accidents happen. If I drop your pizza on the way, Sometimes I’ll shake the box to get the cheese to slide back on the piece.

4. Patience please. It takes 20 minutes to go from raw dough to fully baked pizza. Then, I have to drive to your house.

5. There are some neighborhoods that we will not deliver in, if it feels like getting out of the car means “Rob me! I have cash!”

6. I am a human being. When you see me standing at the door drenched and shivering in the rain, it’s not nice to close the door in my face while you run to search for quarters in the sofa cushions.

7. Use your manners. When you open your door, please hang your cell phone up or put it down. Basic etiquette.

8. Remember to tip. If you order pizza- say, hundreds of dollars of it and then give me a dollar; I am going to have a problem with that.

9. The more the gated community, the more guarded the wallet. The best tips come from middle and lower-class people because they know what we go through.

10.  I can’t wait forever. If you don’t answer your door after I knock, then don’t complain later about not getting your food.

11. The majority of us work 12-14 hour days. So please, don’t call at closing and then complain we cannot accommodate you.

12. Time is money. That’s a reminder for customers who stand at the door and want to chat about the weather.

13. You ordered the pizza and were told how much it costs. When I arrive, please be ready to pay me. Also, I’m just the delivery guy. I don’t have authority to give you a discount.

     Monday at midnight was that dreaded tax deadline. So, here is “tax cat”  for pic o’ day:

tax cat

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A Friday Future Blog

Thursday, April 11th, 2013

     The NBC series “30 Rock” was based on the lives of people that worked in TV. In one episode, Alec Baldwin’s character was quizzing Tina Fey’s “Liz Lemon” character on the future and how she invested her money. She kinda hung her head and said,  “I have twelve grand in checking”.

     My past few blogs have been a bit negative; because mostly, news is news because it’s not positive. Still, I thought that for a Friday, I would try to post something that would impact us for a better future. Something better than Liz Lemon’s plans. So, here are “10 tips for a healthy lifestyle“; an excerpt from “The Best Diet & Fitness Tips” magazine.          

Play mirror, mirror. Write down goals — a certain race pace or a target weight — on your bathroom mirror using a dry-erase marker. This simple act both helps confirm your commitment and serves as an easy and fun reminder to start each day with purpose. (I guess I shouldn’t post “eat more cheesecake” should I?)

Get a dog. Research from Michigan State University shows that man’s best friend can be a powerful motivator to get us to exercise. The researchers found that study participants who owned dogs were more likely to be active than those who did not. In fact, the study found that 60% of dog owners meet federal criteria for regular, moderate or vigorous exercise, compared with around 30% of people who don’t have a dog. (Maybe not so easy to take a cat for a walk)

Head outdoors. Burn calories when you chill out. A study found that going for a 20-minute stroll twice a week was more restorative than getting the same exercise in an indoor environment like a mall.

Heavy, light, heavy, light. To hit the entire spectrum of muscle fibers, set your workouts so that you train heavy one day, then lighter with more reps later in the week.

Train with like-minded people. Working out in a gym with an intense atmosphere, surrounded by people who are equally as passionate about achieving their goals as you are, may push you further and do more for your progress than another factor.

Stay hydrated. Start the day with at least 16 ounces of water. It’s filling, and getting more will improve your recovery after workouts. Aim for one gallon per day.

Cut calories from chicken. Cooking up skinless poultry for dinner is an affordable, easy and fast way to get in quality muscle-building protein. To make it even better for you, skip the swirl of oil and use a tablespoon of water to coat your non-stick plan instead. Cover with a lid and let the chicken steam, then flavor with herbs and spices for a perfectly guilt-free meal.

Rock the oat. You know better than to skip breakfast and risk noshing on extra calories throughout the day. And while oatmeal is a great way to start your morning, you should always aim for balance in every meal. For a little protein and healthy fat, add slivered almonds, and for some fruit, throw in fresh or frozen berries or raisins.

Cultivate gratefulness. Start each day by remembering any experience that recently made you happy — the birthday card you got from an old friend, the compliment your colleague gave you or the tasty new recipe you cooked for dinner. “When negative events happen, people who regularly practice gratitude cope more positively,” says psychologist Alex Wood from the U.K.’s University of Manchester. “They’re less likely to run away from the problem or pretend it’s not happening.” (I do have a wonderful Skinny Cow ice cream recipe. It involves taking wrapper, opening and then eating. Folks seem to like it) 

Curl up with a book. Six minutes could be all it takes to curb that frenzied feeling by 60%, say British researchers. So catch up on your overdue reading — even if you have to do it one chapter at a time.

     Well, I cannot take credit for creating the list, but I like these good reminders. Yes, the blog title does make it seem like I am writing a blog that will be a future blog. Maybe I am… and I just want you back here reading in 2060!

     For pic o’ day, I can’t help but keep laughing at this one that was just sent to me:

sofa stuffing

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The Perfect Blog Excuse

Thursday, March 21st, 2013

     So I sat down to write the blog and realized that I have the perfect  no blog! The great March distraction.

March Madness

     Nothing like just getting a little excited about basketball.

Mascot

     So, gather some friends and let’s enjoy some weekend games!

friendsfriends

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Valvano Cut Down the Nets

Tuesday, March 19th, 2013

I just finished watching ESPN’s “Survive and Advance“  from their 30 for 30 series. It is timely because it is the story of the 1983 North Carolina State Wolfpack as they marched toward an improbable NCAA basketball championship. I have attached the episode listing and here is a link to the description. (ESPN link).

Throughout the show, we are reminded of Valvano’s cajoling and encouragement to his team to survive and advance. Each game, his ten loss squad facing elimination, would find some way to come back and win. Had they not won the ACC tournament that year, they would not have even gotten to the NCAA tournament. To win the ACC, it meant beating a North Carolina team that was led by Michael Jordan; and the beating a Virginia team with Ralph Sampson.

The NCAA championship game matched underdog North Carolina State against the high-flying team from Houston that was known by all as Phi Slamma Jamma, because they played above the rim and ultimately had two of their players end up in the NBA Basketball Hall of Fame, after great pro careers.

I don’t recite these events to simply recount an amazing story of the team that would not be denied. Instead, I was most moved by the mention of something that the team did long before that championship season began.

When Valvano was named coach of the Wolfpack, he called his team to a quiet gym floor to tell them of his vision. He told them that they were going to win a championship. Then, he pulled out a gold pair of scissors and grabbed a ladder. In the quietness of that gym, he made them practice the event of cutting down the nets after winning a championship. He wanted them to visualize what it was going to feel like… when they became champions.

During that 1983 season, no one knew what Jim Valvano would have to face. Ultimately, he was diagnosed with cancer in 1992 and gave his infamous speech about never giving up. Subsequently, The V Foundation has raised over 100 million dollars in the fight against cancer. To a 1983 basketball team, Coach Valvano taught  his team to survive and advance. In 1992, Coach Valvano used that same spirit of hope in the fight against cancer.

Coach K of Duke looks into the camera during the documentary and says that he believes that the championship gave Coach Valvano the platform in the ultimate fight against cancer.  During the ACC championship game between NC State and Virginia, you can  hear Dick Vitale screech, “Cinderella baby..Cin City” as NC State went on to victory and a berth in the NCAA tournament.  A true team with a vision, that was able to overcome to their ultimate goal.

The documentary is a tremendous challenge for every day life. I was reminded that…  if I believe, there are no impossibilities.

And my Mom sent pic o’ day that pretty much says what a lot of us are thinking:

winter

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Truth About False Reality Shows

Monday, March 18th, 2013

Dog tired

 

     Here we go… I am dog tired of reality shows. (I know, I just wanted to use that picture!) Now, we are learning more about one show from some divorce proceeding court documents, and what we are learning is telling us that reality is really, “let’s do it again for the cameras”.

     Lawsuits tend to bring out the truth when people are answering questions under oath. That’s what is happening in the Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries divorce proceedings.

     The wonderful world of romance was initally played out on “Keeping up with the Kardashians”.  Now, through divorce proceedings and deposition transcripts, the testimony is telling how much of the show is really scripted. (Life & Style Weekly)  Here’s what we learned about the lack of reality in this reality show. 

  1. When we saw Humphries propose to Kim K a few years back and he spelled out WILL YOU MARRY ME  on her bed in rose petals; we were actually watching the second take. According to deposition testimony, the scene was re-shot after Kim was not satisfied with the scene or proposal. Apparently, she was bothered with how she reacted to the proposal when on camera, “she had a bad reaction or something and she was embarrassed.”
  2. Another instance of non-reality is  a scene involving Kim and her mother Kris Jenner. They were discussing Kim’s marital problems. We now know that the scene was actually taped after Kim filed for divorce from Humphries in October 2011. By then… difficulties were already down the track.
  3. Another emotion that is not so emotional, according to court documents, is that the characters had tears because of a cosmetic tool known as the “tear stick“. 
  4. In another episode, the mother was angry to learn that there had been a party thrown in her motel room while she was gone. In fact, she was in the room during the shooting of the party. Not such a surprise after all!

       According to the article, Kim Kardashian has attempted to resolve the divorce action of Humphries by offering him an estimated 10 million payoff. Instead, he refuses and is asking for more of her accumulated net worth that is a reported 35 million. Supposedly, under the settlement terms, all matters of the marriage are to be confidential. Humphries apparently believes that he stands to earn a whole lot more with a tell-all book.     

     Maybe this will be the beginning of the end of all of these reality programs. Would people watch, still knowing that reality was not real? Do people watch pro wresting? 

     For pic o’ day we are reminded that reality shows have nothing over real life:

airport reality

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Beat Virginia’s Life Expectancy?

Monday, March 4th, 2013

     In every injury case that we take to trial, we introduce the life expectancy chart (Virginia Code 8.01-419) for the jury to consider when there is evidence of a permanent injury. It also makes me scan the life chart to see how long the law says that I am expected to live.

     According to the chart, at the start, women live to about 80 and men to about 75. The jury instruction tells the jury to give consideration for the rest of that person’s expected life span life. Of course, many clients lean over and whisper to me, “I’m going to beat that!”.

     I have blogged on this before because I am fascinated by the prediction of the length of life. That’s also why I  have blogged on some who have lived long lives, when they discuss their reasons for long life. I am also interested in articles that discuss how to lengthen your life.  

     The March edition of “Parade Magazine” has an article titled “Do You Have a Longevity Personality?” It postulates that having certain emotional traits or even tweaking your behavior can add years to your life. Here are the three characteristics that the article suggests to boost your life expectancy:

     1. Your glass is half full. A study of those over the age of 97.6 consistently found that they were more optimistic and easygoing than the general population. The article recommends that you daily write down things for which you are thankful and it will help to push away the troubles that create negativity.

     2. You’re everyone’s pal. According to a study by Brigham Young University, having strong social relationships can raise survival rates by more than 50%.  It doesn’t mean that you have to be a social butterfly. You can do simple things like invite friends to lunch or join a book club.

     3. You’re never late. Being detail oriented and responsible is consistently associated with longegivity. Making and using to-do lists.

     Staying positive, friendly and organized makes sense,  but coming from a health magazine also gives credence that they really may be a good life-long idea. I just checked the life expectancy chart. Guess what?  I think that it said that I should be writing this blog another 88 years. Let’s all stick together!

     For pic o’ day, here is a cat’s way of keeping the mailman hopping!

cat in mailbox

 

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Life Lessons from an 80-year-old

Tuesday, February 19th, 2013

     Byron Wien, of Blackstone Advisory Partners, decided to list the life lessons that he has learned in the eighty years of his life. What especially caught my attention was that he wrote these and wrote that he is determined to apply these during the next 80 years. I like that positive thinking!  Here are his abbreviated thoughts:

  1. Concentrate on finding a big idea that will make an impact on the people you want to influence.   If you want to be successful and live a long, stimulating life, keep yourself at risk intellectually all the time.
  2. Network intensely.   Nurture your network by sending articles, books and emails to people to show you’re thinking about them.  Write op-eds and thought pieces for major publications.  Organize discussion groups to bring your thoughtful friends together.
  3. Get enough sleep.  Seven hours will do until you’re sixty, eight from sixty to seventy, nine thereafter which might include eight hours at night and a one hour afternoon nap.
  4. Evolve.  Try to think of your life in phases so you can avoid a burn-out.  Do the numbers crunching in the early phase of your career.  Try developing concepts later on.  Stay at risk throughout the process.
  5. Travel extensively.  Try to get everywhere before you wear out.  Attempt to meet local interesting people where you travel and keep in contact with them throughout your life.  See them when you return to a place.
  6. When meeting someone new, try to find out what formative experience occurred in their lives before they were seventeen.  It is my belief that some important event in everyone’s youth has an influence on everything that occurs afterwards.
  7. On philanthropy,  my approach is to try to relieve pain rather than spread joy.  Music, theatre and art museums have many affluent supporters, give the best parties and it can add to your social luster in a community.  They don’t need you.  Social service, hospitals and educational institutions can make the world a better place and help the disadvantaged make their way toward the American dream.
  8. Younger people are naturally insecure and tend to overplay their accomplishments.  Most people don’t become comfortable with who they are until they’re in their 40’s.  By that time they can underplay their achievements and become a nicer more likeable person.  Try to get to that point as soon as you can.
  9. Take the time to pat those who work for you on the back when they do good work.  Most people are so focused on the next challenge that they fail to thank the people who support them.  It is important to do this.  It motivates and inspires people and encourages them to perform at a higher level.
  10. When someone extends a kindness to you, write them a hand-written note, not an e-mail.  Handwritten notes make an impact and are not quickly forgotten.
  11. At the beginning of every year think of ways you can do your job better than you have ever done it before.  Write it down and look at what you have set out for yourself when the year is over.
  12. Never retire.  If you work forever, you can live forever.  I know there is an abundance of biological evidence against this, but I’m going with this theory anyway.

      Well, those are his thoughts, his recipe on life. Almost a recipe for getting things accomplished. And for pic o’ day, here’s a recipe of a different kind:

recipe

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Earl Weaver on Life

Monday, January 21st, 2013

 

 

This past week, former Baltimore Oriole manager, Earl Weaver, passed away at age 82. At the time, he was on a cruise ship that was headed back into the port of Ft. Lauderdale, after having spent a week with a bunch of Oriole fans and some former Orioles players,  on an Oriole theme cruise.

Normally, I wouldn’t write a blog to remember a former baseball manager. However, for any Oriole fan, he represents everything good about the Orioles. Plus, he was especially known for taking on umpires. If you type in any “Earl Weaver” search, it will bring up several videos that show him arguing with umpires.

He did not mind adversity. In fact, he believed that it was his job to argue. He always felt that he would argue for the players so that they didn’t get thrown out of the game. As he said, “I’m only the manager”. That kind of arguing and his lack of fear always made me think that he would have been a great lawyer.

I am not going to write about his hall of fame career as a manager. There are many stories on how he managed. I remember that pitcher Jim Palmer used to humorously say that, “the only thing that Earl knew about pitching, was that he couldn’t hit it”. I could be off a bit on the quote, but one reporter asked him about what part that intellect played in managing. He replied that he was “a whole lot smarter when his players hit a three-run homer”.

Instead of focusing on his humor or how he managed or his relationship with Jim Palmer or other players at the time, I thought that I would focus on his “life thoughts”. I found them in an article in the Washington Post , written by Thomas Boswell, who knew Earl well and still writes about baseball.

The first is about growing up and leadership:

Until you’re the person that other people fall back on, until you’re the one that’s leaned on, not the person doing the leaning, you’re not an adult. You reach an age when suddenly you realize you have to be that person. Divorce did it to me. It could be elderly parents, children … anything. But one day you realize, ‘It’s me. I’ve got to be the rock.’”

Another unusual choice that Earl made was to retire at age 52. Then, he was briefly talked into managing again but quickly retired after that, and was finished entirely. No one could believe that this “ball of fire” could just leave competition behind and never come back. He explained it this way on retirement and the simple things of life:

I know exactly what I need to live on, have since ’57. I’m always going to do the same things. I grow all my own vegetables. I stuff my own sausages. Pork shoulders will be coming on sale next month. I look for chuck roast on sale to use in stew or grind up for hamburgers,” Weaver said. “Doing that takes time and I enjoy it. I’ll have plenty [of money] to play golf every day, run out to Hialeah or the dogs, take [wife] Marianna out to dinner in Fort Lauderdale, and take a walk on the beach. ... don’t want to spend my whole life watching the sun go down behind the left field bleachers.”

Good thoughts on life! So long Earl… you gave this Oriole fan some great memories.

For pic o’ day, here is ”Delivery Dog”. What he is delivering is probably a bunch of nonsense!!!! I think that the box would really come up a bit empty.

 

 

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